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Stephanie Liu
Hey, what's up?
Stephanie Liu
If you guys are interested in learning how to how to just basically be confident on camera how to look and feel natural if you want to straight into the spotlight, this is the place to be. Let me introduce you to my girl XayLi.
Stephanie Liu
What's up? Say what's up?
XayLi Barclay
Stephanie! Hey, everyone, so excited to connect with you guys.
Stephanie Liu
Oh my God, if I could have like my own heart emoji just beating out of my chest right now, I
would say this would be woman crush Wednesday because you guys know that's how I feel about you.
Stephanie Liu
You're crushing, like hearts popping out of my eyes. When it comes to being on camera, even though most professional people get a little bit nervous, but XayLi makes it look so flawless.
Stephanie Liu
So flawless, that she just jumps in front of a camera and she's like, I just woke up like this.
Stephanie Liu
So I got her on the show, cuz I'm like, bro, you gotta share that with me.
Stephanie Liu
You got to share all of that good stuff with me because I got to hang out with you at the Think In Color summit for Thinkific not so long ago.
Stephanie Liu
I don't know about you guys. But if you weren't there, she was dropping knowledge bombs left and right.
Stephanie Liu
I like ran out of pages in my notebook. I was like, I gotta learn some of these tactics.
Stephanie Liu
I love it. I love it. Alright, so for those of you who don't know who miss XayLi Barclay is, she is a visual content creation coach for entrepreneurs.
Stephanie Liu
So she teaches them how to step up into the spotlight, shine on camera, and be their most amazing, beautiful self. Right. Am I right? Am I right?
XayLi Barclay
Yes, yes, yes. You're right.
Stephanie Liu
If you’re tuning in. Let us know where you're watching from. I'm here in beautiful sunny San Diego just flew back from Lima, Ohio, running on three hours of sleep. But it's all good because I got my magical potion in here.
Stephanie Liu
Where are you from right now?
Stephanie Liu
I am in Dallas, Texas. I moved to Dallas two years, almost two years ago. So I'm here. It's a beautiful day. It's a little cloudy. But you know, we grew up with that.
Stephanie Liu
Okay, and you're from Trinidad and Tobago. Is that right? I am.
XayLi Barclay
Yes. I'm originally from Trinidad. Have you been there?
Stephanie Liu
Yes. Never been there. I have not I have been to came in.
Stephanie Liu
And I actually have a couple of viewers like Felicia, who are who's from the same area? And when I told them was like, Oh my god, you know, I'm about to have on the show. She's,
Stephanie Liu
yeah, they're like, watch
Stephanie Liu
you got some Caribbean on the show. Let's do this. I was like, oh my god. We're adding a little brown sugar to your newsfeed right now. Okay, so you guys to tune in.
Stephanie Liu
Any questions about how to be confident on camera, this is the show for you to go in and tune in. If you know anyone else that needs to hear these tips, then have them go ahead and hop onto the show as well. So, XayLi, how did you even get started when it came to? To doing video? Has that always just been in your wheelhouse? Or is this something that you've just picked up along the way?
XayLi Barclay
It is something that I've always loved the visual content. I've always love pictures. I've always loved things that grabbed my attention. I think I was a bit too far ahead. When it came to I was into this years ago so I would take pictures that were you know really professional that Facebook wasn't up on yet. Everyone was still doing their you know, selfies, no shaker selfie. But you know, I was really early in that game. And I I was very nervous about video, but I knew the power that it could, you know, I knew how far I could have reached people. And it's always been one of my goals to leave a legacy. Right?
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, yeah. Always my number one value. Like, yeah, leaving a lasting legacy and opening the door for the next entrepreneur for the next woman to be on camera. dizzy. Married,
XayLi Barclay
yeah, but no, seriously, that's really what it was. And I knew that pictures were pretty cool. But I was always ahead of the game. And knowing that video was what I wanted to do. And so I started YouTube. years ago, I uploaded like one or two videos, and then I deleted it because I was insecure. I felt like you know, I didn't have anything to say I felt like I wasn't ready enough. I felt like this was like old old YouTube. I'm super pissed right now because of that stuff of that girl.
Stephanie Liu
But we're here today. Yeah, we're still doing very well. How did you how like, what was your trick for becoming confident on camera?
Stephanie Liu
Like, what did you have to do to finally just quiet that voice in the back of your head because we all get that I even my clients get that. And I have a couple of tips. But I love hearing tips from other people because maybe mine doesn't work. And then just having an arsenal of other tips that I could pull from it would be helpful. So what did you do?
XayLi Barclay
I tapped into something outside of myself. But I knew that I needed to show up for the people that were waiting for me. And so when I made that mental shift, and trust me, it went in stages like so it was Yes, I'm going to show up, I started showing up like crazy, but I was I would always be perfect and made up. And then I realized that my audience, they weren't always interested in makeup. And so I stopped for for my I have a Facebook group. And so I stopped like even at like everywhere, if you look at my Instagram, which is like my journal. Now compared to years ago, you will see with no makeup natural just talking to everyone being myself because I went through a transition of feeling like I had to be perfect for a while and it got the burnout was so real. So I stopped, I really stopped. So it has different phases of showing up for the people that really need you. And so I went through the phase of showing up consistently and then realizing I want to even show up more authentically. And then I started just and I know it was crazy, because the it was it was even deeper the connection. So that was that's the first thing like people outside of you have sort of this thing that told me Oh, you can't do this or you're not. People are waiting for you darling.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, you know, I think I think that's one of the things that most people don't realize is that when people see you on video, they're already rooting for you. They're like, Oh, I know, she's got something good. And they're just like, Okay, you got this, you got this, you got this and no one is actually watching your video hoping that you're going to fail. Right? Like people want to root for you. I it's just, it's strange, unless you're like a curmudgeon like living in a cave. And you're just like, you just block them. But I would say like you that instead people are always rooting for you.
XayLi Barclay
That and one other thing I don't know, I can't remember who said this. But I always keep it in mind. I always talk about it. Like you’ve probably heard it before. But if you ask a question, somebody assumes that you have the answer. It's kind of like I asked you, Stephanie, do you know what the best brand of water is? Good, like what say, like, and you're looking for me to give me that answer. So that's a chance for me to say, Well, you know, this one has and that one has, and I recommend this. So even if you come on camera, you ask a question, and you're presenting yourself in a specific way people are looking to you for you know, information or for the answer, especially with video. Because for some reason, video, um, you know, you just get a whole different, like, people look up to you when you do video. So you get the expert status that much faster.
Stephanie Liu
Right, automatically, because they're wishing that they can do what you're doing. Yeah.
Stephanie Liu
So your first step is then really just embracing your authenticity and knowing what it is exactly that your audience wants to see. You don't always have to be 100% perfect. They just want to be able to relate to you. And if you're going to be dropping knowledge bombs, which Xay always does, right, then you're going to you're gonna want to keep watching. And it's funny cuz cuz yesterday I did this Instagram story. I don't even know if you saw it.
XayLi Barclay
I've been taking a break from Instagram. I have so many dm it's insane. I was like, You know what, I had an omelet this morning.
Stephanie Liu
It's all good. I'm actually happy that you didn't see it. Because what happened is I did this Instagram story and I just had breakfast. And I had like, I had like a local crumb on my face. I'm like, I know. And I was like, you know it, um, I could be really embarrassed about it. But my audience was just like, it's all good Steph. You're human. I love it. You still did it anyway. And I thought that was I was like, thank you. Thank you, team. Thanks for looking out. But then like, I cursed my friends. I'll say how do you not tell me that I had a crumb on my face?
XayLi Barclay
Let me come on camera, with this crumb. But you know what the thing is that you develop a relationship where we're all friends. So those friends of yours told you even though these shade to them? Didn't, you know? Yeah.
That's pretty cool. Wow. So you rock that with it?
Stephanie Liu
You know what I was just like it. I'm just gonna leave it up just to show that I'm human. And I'll do another video later. Because they feel like, yeah, you could take it down. But whatever. It's all good. And just some people aren't always trying to be nitpicky, they're not trying to say like, Oh, you know, what her hair is imparted correctly? Or, you know, there's a glaring her in her glasses. It's okay.
XayLi Barclay
It's Yeah, you know, that's the, that's the self talk, versus what's real. And so I went through a period where I wrote those things down. So I wrote down what I thought about myself. And then I wrote down what was real, because those two things are two different conversations.
Stephanie Liu
That is very true. That is very true. Because I feel like sometimes people keep telling themselves this story of like, Oh, you could have done better, you could have done better. It's like, how long are you going to tell that story? How long you know, why not tell your story of like, I'm a frickin goddess, and I'm going to be on camera, and it's gonna be fine. It's totally going to be.
XayLi Barclay That's what I just thought. So that that's kind of what confidence is based around. You writing down what you think about yourself, right? Right before you record and writing down the complete opposite of that. So it's like if you're if you're thinking, you know, I'm boring on camera, no one ever look at me, I have you write down? I am amazing on camera, and everyone is tuned in. Yes. You need to put those things out there.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, you want to speak it into existence? Right. And I think it's also helpful when you write down the negative stuff, because you could say, let's say your negative thought is I am boring on camera will expand on that. What makes someone boring on camera? What makes someone boring on camera is if they don't have any inflection point when they're talking on camera, if they're not moving their heads, right? And then you realize, okay, that's what equals boring. And if I just avoid all of that, then I could be like Xay, and I could really, I could be amazing.
XayLi Barclay No, you're so right. Because there are some times where I just pop on, I don't really have anything to say. And I'm like, Oh, yeah, well, this is why so also, a good tip is to think about what you want it like, what are the things that you're interested in? You know, if a video is boring, you're going to click off of it. So you know that you don't want that for your people. So, you know, talk, first of all, have a conversation with these people. Have a conversation is just like, if you're talking to a friend or from telling you, Stephanie, this is what's going on, could you because a lot of another part of confidence for me is thinking that we have to be somebody else.
Stephanie Liu
Oh my god. Yes. Yes, you're like this. This is my newscaster voice or no, that's not me. And if anyone ever meets me in real life, they're going to know that's not me. And so talk more about that. Like you don't have to be someone else.
XayLi Barclay No, you don't you do not. That's the thing that I get the most. And I'm really, really thankful for that when people tell me oh my gosh, exact same person online as well. What else is going on? Like what?
Stephanie Liu
Oh my gosh, do people got stunt doubles? Like what's going on? I actually you know, it like Instagram, people mess with me all the time. Because like, they'll come up and I'm like, co filtering non stop, cuz I was just like, what? I love people on video because you know exactly who they are. They have a curve on their face, like me, whatever. But then you get to know them. And it's not filtered in that sense, right? I mean, yes, you could use story filters and whatnot. But I just feel like when I see someone on camera, and on video, I know how they talk. I know how they are naturally because,
XayLi Barclay You know, like, yeah, I could be you know, I can meet up with that person and be totally cool. Like, you know, yeah, we can vibe.
Stephanie Liu
Because you're in Dallas, right? Okay. See, I feel like if I hit up Dallas, and if I'm at like the convention center, and I see XayLi like across the room, I'm just gonna holler out, it'll look like, it's gonna be instant. Like, I just knew that because I get that. Yeah. And not on like from an Instagram post, right?
XayLi Barclay Hey, so that's where the transition for me and came from pictures to I know, I need to do this, especially in the direction that I was moving where I knew I wanted to change other people's perspectives about things and really influence people. I knew that video had to be, you know, a huge factor. So I started doing it years ago, because I understood how much you know, I can get done with video rather than just posting a picture.
Stephanie Liu
That's very true. Which me but let's be honest, so your pictures are bomb. Okay, so let me just show you guys because the first time I ever hit up this website, right, um, but I'm all about to blow you up right now. The first time I went to her website, look at this. I was already scrolling through it. I was like, first of all, look at this studio setup. Look at it. Just Did you take these photos of yourself?
XayLi Barclay Yeah.
Stephanie Liu
Right. She knows her camera angles. It's all colorful. It's all visual. And it's just amazing. This this cracks me up. You taking the selfie of you taking a selfie? That's so meta. This girl, I gotta take some notes.
Yeah, shout out to Rob. Because Rob is like Bailey's photo game is the bomb.
Stephanie Liu
So now I know. Right? Everybody loves Rob,
XayLi Barclay That part.
Stephanie Liu
The techniques that you use to go on camera to feel confident. Sometimes it's not one size fits all. What are some other tricks that you do with entrepreneurs, when you realize like, okay, that didn't work from them, then let's try this trick. And let's see if that works out for them.
XayLi Barclay You know, I really feel like addressing how you feel about yourself is one of the biggest parts of it. Because a lot of times we we really tell and I feel like this is for anyone. Right? And sometimes I think that it's not that it doesn't work for everyone. I feel like sometimes it takes longer for some people to get how beautiful they are than others. Right? So really a one thing that I always recommend this if I meet someone, you have a consultation call, I tell them step away. Like step away from the internet for a bit, because you've lost yourself there. Right? So you know, I do that a lot like you need to I do it myself. Like I'm not on Instagram right now. I took a break from it because I it was so hectic after the summit, but I needed to step away for a bit. If you really want to find me, you can send an email like you can find me. Yeah, there would have found me. But you know, sometimes you need to detox mentally so that you can focus and get work done. Because a lot of us we work from home, we can get lost on the internet, Mr. Black Hole sometimes, you know, so for me, I yeah, I needed I realized and when I started talking about it, I realized that a lot of my audience was going through it as well. Because when you work for yourself, you don't have you set your schedule. So it's kind of like you can just roll over and get online. And you can easily tell yourself, this is work. But girl, last girl, it work. You got stuff to do. Stop trying to find the bottom of the Facebook timeline, because you're not, okay.
XayLi Barclay Yeah, so take a break from everything so that you can gather your thoughts because what we're doing is we're ingesting everyone else's thoughts, right. And we weren't built that way. That is not how we are. So we're kind of rewiring us ourselves now. But as people we weren't built that way. We weren't built with the constant criticism of other than, you know, we weren't so sometimes you really to step away so that you can focus on your people. And then when you have that figured out, then you can step back in the game, right. So that's a part of kind of understanding who you are and your value. Don't get too caught up in the the online space. Remember, social media is a tool, darling. It's called content marketing. Get on there, do what you gotta do. And get off. That is a huge part of why we hold ourselves, you know, like we tell ourselves things that I wouldn't tell you that Stephanie, so why am I talking to myself this way? Or why am?
Stephanie Liu
Oh my god, yeah. Okay, so, okay, so that, that just triggered something in me, right? Because sometimes the things that we say to ourselves are so mean. And you're just like, you would never say that to Rob or to Mike, or to Anisha or XayLi or everyone that's watching, you would never say no. Why would you even say that to yourself, be kind to yourself, you know, you can't expect others to respect you, if you eat, you can't even respect yourself, right? You gotta like, you gotta love yourself, too. You know, and if you don't, that's definitely going to come off on camera. And so when you're one with yourself, and when you're cool with yourself, and you love your imperfections, then you can go ahead and step forward.
XayLi Barclay And just you have to address you know, like, I'm not saying on camera, address it, but you have to know, this is me, and this is how I'm going to show up. So you can't be mad because somebody told you something it comes with it happened.
Stephanie Liu
It happens.
XayLi Barclay Yeah, if I show you my YouTube comments, the ones that spam catches, you're gonna be like, girl. Oh, my. Bro, you don't even know me?
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, no, I had someone leave a comment on my, on one of my videos. And I had been traveling for like seven hours, like on a plane for five hours. And then I got like, this negative comment on YouTube. And they're like, Oh, this content is old. And I was like, Well, yeah, because this was two years ago, things change. And then the response back and this was Kermit the Frog? I don't know. So but you Kermit the Frog. I don't know why you hate and on YouTube videos, but Kermit said, well, I don't really care anymore. And I was just like, you know, womp, womp, Sorry, Kermit.
XayLi Barclay Yeah, exactly. So you have to know that those things are going to happen. But that has nothing to do with you. And it's crazy. Because a lot of times the things that they're saying to us, we talked ourselves like that. Yeah, right. Yeah. So you have to know like, how to navigate through those things. Like you have to get to a point where you know, it's just a slow go, you know, like, you know how beautiful you are, you know how good of a person you are, you know how you show up for others, you know, how you show up for yourself. And so you're able to just push past all of the things that you might be thinking and just deliver when you get on camera.
Stephanie Liu
Love it. So feed yourself some positivity step away from what other people think is what beauty means or what confidence means and get to be one with yourself, write it down, keep that around, you know. And then just own it. Like I know, for me, whenever I jump on camera, I get butterflies. And sometimes I get really nervous. But I know that sometimes the feeling of nervousness can also be a trait of just being excited. You know, sometimes when you're excited, and when you're fearful, they're actually reversed. Scared, really excited. And so how do you help someone who, you know jumps in front of the camera and their palms are starting to get a little sweaty, and their heart rate starts to beat a little faster? How do you get them to calm down?
XayLi Barclay How do you get them to come down? I think what eliminates that from my people is planning, like knowing what you're going to say and also just being prepared for. I mean, I really teach pre recorded video. So you know, it's a bit less scary. So I really teach them to make friends with the lens. Yes, yes. Right that rhymes, friends with the lens. But you got you've got to make friends with your your lens. Like it's just another person that you're talking to, you know, it's I mean, I can imagine for you like, teaching live video is scarier, although I have met people that are nervous about more nervous about pre recorded, then likes, I've had both sides of it. Yeah. But if it's if your content is conversational, like I had one of my students, Sasha, go the other day, she was looking at one of the courses and she's says XayLi is just really on here having a conversation.
Stephanie Liu
Yes. It's only really, I mean, all that it really is. Okay, so what camera are you using right now for the for the show.
XayLi Barclay Right now, I have the Logitech Brio, simple, easy, no crazy settings. Like because I'm, I'm your real techie girl. But that like there are times when you just don't, you just don't need all the drama going on. So I have a webcam up right now.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah. So even with a webcam, what I find to be very helpful is that even when you're looking at it, you see your reflection. And so if anything, you just pretend that you're talking to yourself.
XayLi Barclay I have full blown conversation with myself.
Stephanie Liu
Okay, I thought I was the only one because I'll sometimes I'll be in the car with like the top down. And like, overall, you look good. Oh, thank you.
XayLi Barclay Full blown.Yeah, okay. Good.
Stephanie Liu
I love it. Okay. So for those of you that are tuning in, what we're talking about is how you can be confident on camera. And if you're already nailing it, and if you're already amazing kudos to you. But sometimes, if you are doing social media for clients, right, you have to convince your clients on how they could be confident on camera. And sometimes those strategies are not one size fits all. And so we've talked about things about like writing down about what's positive about you. And then making a comparison chart between what makes someone feel not confident on camera and defining it so that way you know what to avoid, right. And then we've also talked about like how important it is to feel as if on camera, you're just having a conversation. I find that to be the most helpful. I I feel like XayLi and I were just kind of like long lost best friends.
Stephanie Liu
And if every member in the same city as you, I'm probably going to tell you and I'm just like, tackle you.
XayLi Barclay
Listen, I'm here for it. Now. It's so true. So true. And I like I like that you said like, you know, there are things that may not work for us because I'm learning something to you to like, Ooh, I like that. I like this. Because, you know, it's different everyone, and some things may not work for some people and some things may work for some people kind of like makeup. Guys don't get it. Right. ladies do get it. But I, you know, I feel like we have to also understand that when you're online and you're seeing all the things that are going on, the people that you see are probably influencers or beauty bloggers and you know, things like that. And so my people are sometimes like, well, Xay you know, I don't really wear makeup. Like girl, don’t.
Stephanie Liu
Like, yeah, to your point earlier, why try to pretend that you're someone else, because you are training when a new client and you show up in person to that business meeting. And they're like, Whoa, that doesn't even look like you. They're gonna feel like they just got catfished. So you might as well show up as yourself, right?
XayLi Barclay
No, it's so true. And so there was a time where, like you said catfish? I used to make it joke cuz I used to wear wigs. And I would say, I would laugh on camera and be like, I don't even know how you guys still pay me because I show up with a different week every week.
Stephanie Liu
I love that. You mentioned that because I have honestly, I've honestly thought about wearing wigs. I have like five, right?
XayLi Barclay
You have wigs? Oh my god,
Stephanie Liu
I have five of them. Because you know, as a mom, I'll say my hair. So if I could just put like a part one with the nice waves up so cute. Yeah.
XayLi Barclay
Where are these pictures?
Stephanie Liu
On my secret secret Instagram, which I will share with you later. Because I got like a purple lavender one.
We're getting off track.
Stephanie Liu
We'll have a different show. And people won't know who Yeah. How do you get people to remember what to say when they're on camera? What are your tips and tricks for that?
XayLi Barclay
I feel like knowing you know, what your bringing them in with, right? I say no more than three points. So definitely get your notebook out, I use I remember, there was a time where I felt like if I was looking at my notes, I didn't know what I was going by. Now. I'm like, guys, my notes right here. So if I look down, I'm looking at my notes. Because that means I really took my time to understand what you guys want. figure out exactly how I can deliver it to you. And you know, deliver it and then you close out like you review and then you close out you know, you want to always bring it back together and close out. It depends on like what the live is about, you know, you'll have your call to action and things like that. But at the same time, people don't have all day. So be respectful of people's time. You know, and really keep it like, like we said before, conversational, but make sure that you're touching on your point, like, you know, what are three things that they can take to next level, whatever, whatever it is that you're teaching, but write it down. And don't we are not here to be perfect.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, yeah.
XayLi Barclay
Well, even looking at your notes, look at your notes, like you know, share, I feel like when you really share in that way, you remove all barriers of what you think someone might be thinking about you.
Stephanie Liu
Very true, very true. Let me tell you guys like so whenever I do a show, I write my notes down. So you saw the Facebook event where I'm just like, Okay, this is what the show is now. In this episode, you're going to learn three things. Hey, if you haven't noticed, every single time, this is a trick for me for you guys. So any of you that are live streamer. Anytime I need to go back to my notes, I flip the screen over to Xay. And then we can talk about legs all day. But hold up. I had like a second point that we had to go back to and then that's my trick. I'll like go back, put it on the screen. Make sure I'm looking at it and then jump back on.
XayLi Barclay You know what Stephanie. I'm let me bring my notebook. Because I need these notes that you have. Oh my Are you looking at your notes right now? Right now. That is genius. I like that I'm feeling but thank you.
Stephanie Liu
And you should Anisha comment right now because she just shared. Well, this just hit me I wear a wig because I had cancer and shaved my head. And I wondered if that was an issue for people, but it hasn't been so that's great to put that out there. And, you know, I honestly think whatever makes you feel confident what makes you ever freakin do it?
XayLi Barclay Hello,yes. You know what, and the beautiful thing about us having our own businesses is that we get to show up as who we are. And we get to add depth to our stories. The things that have happened to us that are you know, we're probably challenging. So, uh, Anisha, that's, that's absolutely amazing. You have a right to wear every color wig of the rainbow that you would like.
Stephanie Liu
I want to do a show, I already got goosebumps. I'm about to blow my Instagram Stories right now just for you. And I'm gonna tag you in every single, the both of you.
XayLi Barclay Are gonna make me download Instagram.
Stephanie Liu
I was at a conference like yesterday with Mia Voss, and she was talking about like how what we were as women on camera or whether we're on stage, it's not about being fake or whatever. It's about what makes you feel powerful and confident. And if anything, just view your wigs or your or your false eyelashes or whatever is just that's your super cape. That's your cape. And that's good. And don't be ashamed of it. That's just true. You are and go for it.
XayLi Barclay That's what my glasses are my super cape. Really. Everyone thinks I need glasses, but I don't I really use a glasses to protect my eyes from the blue light. But they're not none of my glasses are tested. I just love glasses and I just feel like, you know when I put them on like, okay, Xay.
Stephanie Liu
Okay. I love that. Even I was just like, I was trying to guess what yours was. I was like, maybe it's her earrings because I'm always in love with your earrings and you actually make some of your own earrings, right?
XayLi Barclay I mean, do you know it's crazy that you say that, I swear you are here in Dallas. I thought about that. Today I'll have one of my lucky earrings. Like nothing, maybe a theme because I kind of like these. Yeah, it's so crazy that you said that I was looking at my earrings. And I was like, a wacky earrings. I need to go shopping.
Stephanie Liu
I need some new earrings. I'm like, you know what? But I love it. It's like a signature look for you. And like every time I was like scrolling through your website, I was just like, oh god, I love this. I love the color. Which brings me to my my third point for this show is you are you do you see her studio behind you? Like please tell them the story of that wall behind you.
Stephanie Liu
How you designed it?
XayLi Barclay Oh, ok. So this is something I wanted to be for like two years I use it. And I had so many like reserves about it like it are the dots to playful are they but they're actually decals. So they're actually individual dots. But I took like two days to think individually on the walls. Because I wanted something different I wanted Yeah, you know what I like that thing people to hear so that they listen to what I have to say. So if you're scrolling and you see my video, you're going to slow your scroll sis, or sir.
XayLi Barclay So that's what it is just having something up there that kind of pops out at you that is different so that you can be like, Hey, you know, I'm smart. And I have something to say listen to me. So you know, that's really and honestly, that has been attention with currency man. And so if you're like me, I'm not the person to be like, hey, look at Listen, I'm not that person. But I can do that visually. So that's my superpower.
Stephanie Liu
I love it. Yeah. Because in the news feed, you could either get stuck in the sea of sameness and have a plain boring background. Which by the way, I mean, that's okay, if you're just if you're starting out, I totally get I'm not saying that you have to go run out and like buy stuff all the time to do your studio. These are just a couple of tips if you want to go ahead and stand up from this the famous and you're right because I've never seen anyone have a polka dot background. Yeah.
Stephanie Liu
At first I thought it was like one of those removable wallpaper things. I was obsessed. Like no Steph, I actually individually did these. I was like, That is crazy.
XayLi Barclay Yeah, know what because before I had a yellow background, and that's how I would start people on the internet. So I have a bright yellow background. And when I as you grow, it's time to change things. So as I grew up, like, you know what, I really want to change this yellow. And so I asked people, and they're like, no, anytime I see yellow, I think it's you. Yeah, that's good. Because that is what you know, visuals are you want people to if they hear something or see something you want them to think of you right?
Stephanie Liu
Uh huh. No, go ahead. Go ahead.
XayLi Barclay I was just like, I have to up level this yellow.
Stephanie Liu
Reminds me of my home girl Goldie Chan, because she actually has green hair, like legit green hair.
XayLi Barclay I follow her because of you. Yeah. And
Stephanie Liu
So she's like the Oprah of LinkedIn. And like, everyone knows her because of her, her career. And I was like, is your hair really clean? Or do you wear a wig? Going back to wigs? Is No way No, it's her real hair. And she was the type before she got really big, she would change her hair color, like every six months or so. But then it became her signature trademark. And I feel like the polka dots are your signature trademark. Same thing with her hair. Even for like Lights Camera live the very beginning when people watch the show, it's always me inside the desktop, right? That is like my signature, intro and you know how it is, you know, often imitated, never duplicated, right. But here's some other tips on how to create a scroll stopping studio.
XayLi Barclay Your light is very important. So whether you invest in a simple light kit, right, there are some really affordable ones out there. Lighting is super essential because most people are always under lit. So you know if you're a girl, like where's your light, but yes, still your light as in your light around you. And your light. Let your true self shine out. Like I love smiling. That's who I am. If you meet me in person, I'm always laughing. I'm always you know. And even when I'm doing shoots, like I make a joke out of myself, like you have to learn how to do that. And so in that in that way, you know, for me, the biggest tip is really lighting. And if you have some kind of prop or something that you always have, or you're always like, I don't know, probably still here, but Rob is obsessed with coffee and coffee shops. And now I can't think about her without thinking about Rob. Right? So you find that thing that you really like, don't let it be something you don't like, because then you're going to be like this thing again.
Stephanie Liu
Oh my god, that was me. That was me when I first told me about that. Okay, when I first started livestreaming I had this horrendous bookcase behind me. And it was only horrendous because I read a lot of books. Right? And so I looked really disheveled. And I tried to be creative. Yeah, I had to color coordinate my books and I can never find my frickin books again. I was like never again. So then instead of using that wall that had the bookcase, I just flipped in my camera around and then I dedicated one wall, for the props.
XayLi Barclay Ya know that so much sense because my wall is just this there's a door right here. And then I have light, like I have two huge windows with natural light. So for me, and and for me, like even apartment hunting. Because sometimes I work from my apartment. Sometimes I come into the office like in scouting both. The main thing on my mind is this is my business. So I don't care if my bedroom you know, doesn't have malls, but somewhere needs to have a wall that I can dedicate to video for. Just like Stephanie said, like finding a space that is native to what you do is so important.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah. And get creative with it. Because I've actually had other friends like I who, when she first started livestreaming the only place that she could go in her house was in her laundry room. So she would put like a stack of books on top of the dryer and then her laptop because that was the only area where it wouldn't be so cluttered. Because sometimes you get stranded when there's clutter in the background. You're like what is going on back there? Unless it was intentional, right? Like I've seen like Roberto Blake, like when he goes he does his videos like he'll have a monitor and then in the monitor it'll have like that. Yeah, like wavy thing. And it ties because just like is something in a pop up.
XayLi Barclay Right? You don't know like, now I know. I'm not crazy. Cuz I would think the same thing. But yeah, no, you're absolutely right. Oh, wow. No, so true.
So yes, find a place that you know, you're it doesn't have to be perfect guys. Like for me got yellow back. There's this thing where a genius. What is it Stephanie, creativity. Know, like, in other words, when you don't have the things that you would like to have, you get creative, and you make something happen. There's it like fancy thing for it. If you remember it, or if you know it, please share it in my comments. But that yellow background was actually a little corner of my living room in New York. Right.
XayLi Barclay So I would have Yeah, I had like, it was the jankiest setup girl. And I share pictures of it like in my membership and things like that, but you would never know. Okay, yeah. Oh, nice. Why I yeah, I like to go back there. Like, this is what I started with. You know, and you can do, yeah, out there. I mean,
Stephanie Liu When I first started, you guys, I used a green screen because I had to hide that hideous green screen behind me. And then I would just put a stock photo right there. And then people thought that that was my office, but it wasn't. But for those of you that want to use a real space, I did this. I did this funny Instagram story a long time ago, where actually I went into the 99 cent store.
They have some really cute props that you could use to design your office like this over here. I actually got that from Target that was probably like $15 or so. But then the 99 cent store had it for like six bucks. And I was like what
XayLi Barclay Girl, you got scammed.
Stephanie Liu I know, right?
So you check out your local store, your Goodwill's? any of that stuff. Because you could find some really creative things like I found that little Buddha thing. That's actually, you know, when you decorate your fish tank, and then you could put that's actually a fish tank Buddha. But you wouldn’t know.
XayLi Barclay You would not know that's even like a It's so crazy. So when I was in that stage of doing it in my living room, I would be so upset that I would have to if I took the fabric down, it would get wrinkled, right? And so I went to the fabric store and I ended up asking the guy like this is like the you're like to figure your hood fabric store. There's one in every hood, where I asked him for a wrinkle free fabric. And so he gave me Papillon, and I realized, oh my gosh, it doesn't wrinkle. And I was so excited to share that with my people. It was probably like $2 a yard. So you can really buy a good bit. And I always told them, don't buy an expensive green screen, because you could just buy green Papillon. And it's $2 a yard.
Stephanie Liu
I wish somebody told me that because I went on Amazon and I got that one. It's like a portable green screen. And then you collapse it. I can't collapse. I can't do anything. So my husband actually filmed me in the living room like, you know, I like trying to collapse this, wrangle it.
XayLi Barclay Yes, no, it's so it's so good. And it's still like that, you can actually pin, it with pins on the wall. And it's so easy. And so you can use green Papillon as well. And it's $2 a yard, you get you $2 yards, and you're set.
Stephanie Liu
Switch it up to something different. So yeah, when you're doing your videos, because you know how I mean, you do branding as well. And sometimes for certain campaigns, especially for clients, like mine, they'll do a brand refresh, you know, like, they might update their website and all that stuff. What are your thoughts about updating your studio?
XayLi Barclay You know what I do believe in that. And it's crazy because I felt nervous about doing it before because, you know, I felt like I would disconnect from my people. So and every time you elevate, you will for me, it's always nerve racking and it's always like, you know, so even now I'm transitioning out of using my wall as much because I have the Dallas city line in front of me, right. So I've recently started filming the other way around, which is where I see the cityscape behind me. I'm like, you know, you're, you're always going to go through like, who's gonna think that I'm like showing out? You gotta do you.
Stephanie Liu
And me Yeah, me. Maybe it's because maybe it maybe she was from a female perspective. Yeah, but I feel like, it's kinda like your front door. Like sometimes you'll have like a wreath outside. And it's like, it's spring, it's summer. And like, you just want to freshen things up just yet. So I love that you're open to the idea to because I about it. I'm not quite sure what to do just yet.
XayLi Barclay I know. No, you know what it like? Like, you know, I can't remember her name the person you just mentioned on the desk. Um, you know, if you, if it makes you feel good, I say do it. So for me, yes, it's easier to film this way. And I still will do it. But for specific videos, like if I'm doing a series, I'm about to release a whole new series on YouTube. So if I'm doing a series, I will do it that way. Or if I'm doing my sales pages, I will do it that way. You know, um, so because then again, I do teach video, I've got to show up. Something's got to. Yeah, that's right. Like that.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, like this is for the sales page. This is a lifestyle. That's cool.
XayLi Barclay For marketing yet, if I want to throw up a quick, easy video, like now, I have so many things I want to share via screen share. But I want to make a standard intro for those videos where I don't want to always be like, Hey, guys, this is what we're talking about. If I do a standard intro, then I can just do this feature and throw the video up. Like when I think about things that make it easy for us to produce. Right. Yeah. And so I will do that, you know, probably with this background, because those are always really quick, easy and simple videos, you know?
Stephanie Liu
Yeah, I love that. I love that idea. You know, and the reason why I'm thinking about this is because for me, like, I once had a guest who had like a chandelier and like a purple background. And then I have like my bookcase with my multicolor stuff. And then it just looks cluttered to the max.
Stephanie Liu
And so that's where I was like, Okay, if I'm going to do this for live streaming, I need to have like, not so much going on, because then I wanted to balance out
XayLi Barclay Especially what you do, that's what you do. So you want to you want to show, you want to show up for what you do, which is also why I kind of, I always want to show up and give great value. Because a lot of times when you're doing something like that you're showing up like that. You also want to show them that, hey, it's just not only about this set, but you're here for my brain basically. That's right. We all think differently. So if you have good information like definitely like stand in who you are and you know when you want to up level I do believe in it. I do believe in changing. But I also do believe in reaching back and saying this is not where I started.
Stephanie Liu
Yeah. Oh my god. Yeah. I mean, you look at like I love Marie Forleo's like her very first videos was her sitting on her couch, yeah, with the brick wall, right. And then it upgraded to her sitting on a barstool. Like, I watched too much, Marie.
XayLi Barclay Oh, no, I always have clients who come to me and I know that, who they're going to tell me they want their videos to look like. And I send them all the way back like Marie didn't start there. Your her day 100 is not going to be your day one. And what you're going to do is frustrate yourself over the looks rather than thinking about your strategy for video. That's my main thing, understanding your strategy for video before you even you know, think about like, even my path for my students. They usually want to learn like the setup. And I'm like, that comes after? Yes. And because finance is knowing what you're going to talk about and how it's connected. How is it paying off? How is it connecting with the return on it? before you even get into like, you know what it looks like? Know what you're gonna say?
Stephanie Liu
That is very true. And PS By the way, I think Yeah, just remember that phrase that you're trying to remember. She said necessity breeds creativity. Is that what you're looking for?
XayLi Barclay Come on. Yeah,
Stephanie Liu
Good, good, good. And then Mike Alton says, always show up and give great value, because that's what people are going to remember. And so speaking of great value, right? Let's talk about Camfidence. Tell them a little bit about confidence and what it is that you do for your clients?
XayLi Barclay Yes, well, so Camfidence is really a process. And it's really a process of like I mentioned before, understanding who you are, who you're going to help or who you're trying to help, understanding what they're looking for what they need from you, and really just putting that out on camera so that you're not like, thinking about all the wrong things, right? Yeah. That happens, we're thinking about the wrong things. And we forget that we're really here to connect with people and really change something about their life. Right. So just removing yourself from it and showing up for your people. I feel like that's the base thing where Camfidence is concerned.
XayLi Barclay So what I did was actually I gave you guys the actual audio and worksheets that I use, and still you guys that I used years ago and still use up to now to just get me together before I do something because we do end up thinking, me, me, me, me, me. Right? But if you are sharing help, and content is them, them, them it's you, you you it's not, you know, it's not only about you and yourself. So I feel like when we remove those barriers, we're able to show up as our best selves for our people. And so that's how we get more people. And you know what people love a journey. So if you don't show up now, as who you are, when will you show up girl? It’s the best time.
So head to Camfidence.com get your bundle.
It's the audio and the bundle? And? Yes. Why people are messaging me about it. Like how did you even like, I feel like you knew exactly you.
Yeah, so go grab yours.
Stephanie Liu
Yep. I love it. I love it. I think it's going to be absolutely brilliant for you guys to go to Camfidence.com, right? Because just imagine what it would be like to hear these amazing voice in your ear, cheering you along and coaching you along the way. That way you could be brilliant on camera and look and feel natural, not fake and just kind of owning it in your own space. So thank you so much for sharing, sharing that all with the Lights Camera Live Crew.
And you guys, if you have any questions for Xayli, by all means go ahead and drop them in the comments. Now, we've been chatting for an hour, we've talked about camera confidence, we've talked about defining what it would look like for you to be confident on camera things to avoid. Why it's important for you to know what your superhero cape is, whether it's your glasses, your earrings, your wigs, whatever you know, own it.
Stephanie Liu
And we also talked about how to make a scroll, scroll stopping studio because let's face it, a lot of people there's just a lot of stuff in the news feed and you got to stand out from the crowd. And it whether it's polka dots in the background, or whether it's just like little knickknack that help you. Did you want to add anything else for the rest of the crew?
XayLi Barclay Um, no, just that, you know, I'm excited to see new guys get on camera and you know, really crush your fears. And really just tap into, you know what you're saying go home, you have so much goodness to share. People are waiting for you. Don't let what you're telling yourself get into the way because what you're telling yourself 90% of the time is not true.
Stephanie Liu
That is very true. And PS by the way, you are speaking which conference is coming up.
XayLi Barclay Video Marketing World I'm being in August. And listen, you don't want to miss it because it's going to be absolutely amazing. And I'm actually heading to speak at a meetup right after I talk to you this evening. So I'm excited about that too. We're talking about core video for courses so it's the Texas video crater meetup not that you guys are in Texas, but you still have time to plant the video marketing world level love to see you guys there.
Stephanie Liu And the video marketing world is in Dallas.
XayLi Barclay Yes, it's Dallas luckily Right. Yeah. So now and then I'll be in San Diego. I just remembered in October. That's me. Oh my god, I just thought that
Stephanie Liu Yeah, I will pick you up from the airport.
XayLi Barclay Don't get me excited.
Stephanie Liu All right, you guys. Well, thank you so much for tuning into today's show. It's been a while since I've been on the air. As you guys know, I've been running around from conference to conference. Yesterday was the second to the last. And then it's VidCon boom, times gonna fly and then October is gonna come and then I'm just gonna be like, XayLi.
XayLi Barclay I know, right? We're probably do a video for you guys.
Stephanie Liu It'll be like in slo mo where I'm like running. Don't put that visual in my head cuz I will really, we should totally do that. Like as soon as we see each other, let's pretend to just like slow run to each other.
Stephanie Liu
I love it when you get like to video content creators together because then our ideas are just like mind blowing. And then we'll do that part. Guys, thank you so much for tuning in. I'm probably going to hang out with XayLi just a little bit longer on Skype, but I will let you guys go. Thanks so much. If you have any questions, drop them in the comments and then XayLi and I will go ahead and answer them. So for now you guys Peace out. We'll talk later.
Thank you. See you later.
ABOUT THIS EPISODE
Imagine how life would be if you could master the art of confidence.
How would that impact you, your business, and your dreams?
If I told you that unleashing your confidence is as easy as counting to 10 - you'd want to know wouldn't you?
In this episode, special guest XayLi Barclay, joins Lights, Camera, Live to show you how to strut into the spotlight and melt your fears of being on camera.
IN THIS EPISODE, YOU’LL LEARN
The Camfidence Mindset
How to Captivate on Command
Tips & Trips for a Scroll-Stopping Studio
ABOUT XAYLI BARCLAY
XayLi Barclay is a Visual Content Creation Coach who specializes in helping entrepreneurs effectively stand out and make a genuine impact in the digital space. Through captivating images and original video content, she teaches others how to effortlessly create the visual appearance they’ve always dreamed of in order to unlock multiple revenue streams, attract paid opportunities and connect on a deeper level with their audience.
How did you tell that negative voice in your head to stop holding you back?
“I tapped into something outside of myself,” explained XayLi Barclay, “I knew that I needed to show up for the people that were waiting for me.”
When XayLi first started showing up online, she thought that she needed to be perfectly made up. Perfect hair, perfect make up - you get it. Until one day she was burnt out and disappeared completely from social. She needed a break.
It was then that she realized that, her core audience was there for her and they weren’t expecting perfection. This lead to a deeper connection with her viewers.
XayLi pointed out that when you start showing up on camera, people will start to look up to you. She added, “It’s the fastest way to achieve that expert status.”
Remember that.
“People are waiting for you darling.”
In addition to thinking about what her audience wanted, XayLi also worked on shifting the conversation inside of her head.
“It’s Self Talk vs. What’s Real,” she explained. “I went through a period where I wrote those things down. I wrote down what I thought about myself and then I wrote down what was real, because those two things are two different conversations.”
XayLi encourages everyone to speak what they want to be true into existence.
“Write down the negative thoughts then on the column right next to it, write down a positive version,” she added. “Hold on to the positive.”
What’s the first thing that viewers should do if they want to build their self-confidence?
Barclay recommends writing down what you think about yourself and then writing down the exact opposite. You might say “I’m boring on camera, no one will watch me” and then turn it around and write “I’m amazing on camera and everyone will be tuned in,” Barclay explained.
“First of all, have a conversation with these people, have a conversation is just like, if you're talking to a friend, she added. “Part of confidence for me is thinking that you have to be somebody else.”
Barclay told viewers that being yourself is enough and it allows your audience to really get to know you.
Why is stepping away from the Internet so important to creating video content?
“Take a break from everything so that you can gather your thoughts because what we're doing is we're ingesting everyone else's thoughts,” Barclay shared. “And we weren't built that way.”
Instead of spending time trying to find the end of Facebook Barclay suggests logging off and focusing on YOUR people, your audience, your value.
“Remember, social media is a tool, darling,” she explained.
Barclay urged views to stop telling yourself something you wouldn’t tell your friend and start creating content.
How do you handle haters and rude comments?
“That has nothing to do with you,” Barclay shared. She expressed that you know who you are, you know how and where you show up for others, and more importantly, how you show up for yourself.
Barclay recommended to push beyond the negative comments and focus on delivering quality content to your audience.
How do help someone calm down before going on camera?
“Knowing what you’re going to say and just be prepared,” Barclay explained.
Barclay suggested on having a plan of what you’re going to say in the video and learning to “make friends with lens”. Doing so can help cut down on nerves before recording video or going live.
“Your content should be conversational”, Barclay suggested.
If you need more tips, check out my Facebook Live Video Script Template - it’s FREE!
What are your tips and tricks for remembering what to say on camera?
“Get out your notebook”, recommended Barclay, “and then share it. And we’re not here to be perfect.”
Barclay’s tip to keeping your confidence on camera:
No more than three points
Provide a final review
Finish the conversation
She stated, “people don’t have all day, respect their time.”
Best advice for designing a scroll-stopping studio?
Barclay encouraged viewers to create a studio that pops out on a newsfeed, a studio that is different. Use background visuals such as Barclay’s dots to bring attention.
“Finding a space that is native to what you do is so important”, urged Barclay.
One thing not to forget, is light, don’t be underlit in your videos. There are affordable kits or use natural light in your home or office. “Lighting is very important. Both the light on you and YOUR light” explained Barclay.
“Attention is currency. ”
What are your thoughts on updating your studio?
“Every time you elevate, it’s nerve-racking,” shared Barclay. Explaining that she’s in the midst of changing up her studio to take advantage of the Dallas cityscape.
Consider updating your studio for different video series, your sales pages, or for marketing purposes. You don’t have to change the studio completely but camera angles can make a visual impact.
Barclay also suggested to “think about things that make it easy to produce”, which background is best suited for quick and simple videos.
“You’re here for my brain basically,” shares Barclay to remind viewers it’s not just about the studio background but how you show up and deliver value.
Tell us more about what Camfidence is.
“It’s a process of understanding who you are, who you are trying to help, what they need from you, and putting that out on camera,” explained Barclay.
You can visit Camfidence.com and download an audio and workbook bundle to help you connect with your audience.
“I feel like when we remove those barriers, we’re able to show up as our best selves,” shared Barclay. “If you don’t show up now, when will you show up?
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